The 14 things they gradeThe checklistyour landlorduses.
It's the same sheet at every approved-housing complex in town. We clean to it, in this order, and we don't leave until all fourteen are done.
Racks out, and the glass door you can't see through anymore.
Pans get replaced if they're past saving. We'll tell you.
Defrosted, plus the door seal where the milk went.
Crumbs count. So does the shelf liner nobody has lifted.
Including the ring, and the drain, and the shower head.
That's the one they always check.
Every slat. This is the slowest thing on the list.
A year of dust lives on top of the door frames.
Scuffs, tape residue, and whatever the command strips took with them.
Inside faces and the track full of dead flies.
Vacuumed and spot-treated. Shampoo is extra, see prices.
Mopped, edges by hand, under the fridge.
Bulbs replaced if one is out.
Emptied. The abandoned futon is not on the list.
Price,split four ways.
Whole apartment, whole checklist, one flat price. Divide it by however many names are on the lease.
Carpet shampoo is $40 on top. Night-before-your-flight timing is $25. If the oven has had a real fire in it we'll say so before we start, not after.
Four separate Venmos is normal here. Pay after the walkthrough passes, not before. Nothing to sign.
When wecan come.
Three weeks a year the whole town moves at the same time. Those weeks we run 7am to 10pm and take the schedule in order.
Winter track ends. Every complex empties at once.
Spring track. Hottest week to be scrubbing an oven.
Fall track. Book this one early, it goes first.
Call the day before and we can usually fit you. Call the morning of and we'll try, because we've all been three days from a flight with a dirty oven.